Chased by Children

How Ya Like me, now?

Let's see if I can bring you up to speed on my life in the last six months in six words or less.....

I's might be a tad bit bitter.

Nope that's seven and one is a contraction (and not even a legal one).  Sue me.

Seriously, here is the update.

I'm still living in the same house with the WasBand.  not.  funny.

I am still working (at the moment).  not. funny.

My children are all in therapy.  not. kidding.

I've recently been mistaken for a lesbian.  sort of funny.

Life is certainly interesting these days.  And by interesting I mean searingly painful.

But that is not even why I wrote today.  The reason I wrote today is because it is Brother Gunny's birthday.  And while the rest of my life seems like a pit of despair he continues to be one of the few bright spots.

I love you Gunny.  Happy Birthday.

Brother Gunny has an expectation of privacy...ha ha ha

My hand to Jesus, I recieved the following email from my brother, Gunny.  I wonder if he thought I would print it unedited on my blog...it's like he doesn't  know me at all.

Jen,

Just a few comments related to current events and some things that I read on yours and your mother’s blogs.

Comment #1: In reference to your letter to PIFs, I can’t think of anyone I would rather be fired by than you.  Just kidding.  As a matter of fact, I believe that being fired by my sister is probably just about the worst experience that I could imagine.  Hence, my aversions to ever working for the company that you are working for.

Comment #2:  I had a discussion with your parents about the chair that appeared in your mother’s blog and we decided that I am much more deserving of this little gem.  Also just kidding.  This is one of those times that I wish that there was any validity to your assertions that I am a favorite. (pssst....readers you can go here to see what he's talking about) 

Comment #3:  During the recent large step that our federal government has taken toward socialism,  I have thought often of the lessons learned in Atlas Shrugged.  I found my self wishing that some of the idiots who were discussing “Rescue Package” had read it.  I also remember who originally suggested that I read that book.  “Who is John Galt?”

Hope all is well with you.

A couple of comments about my brother. 

He's old.

He likes to talk about all sorts of important things.  to me.  weird, eh?

He actually is my parent's favorite.    But I called dibs on the rocking chair. 

Creative Problem Solving

Brother Gunny doesn't like to talk about his problems...and conversely I love to talk about his problems and I have a blog.  tee hee.

I got an email from Brother Gunny's lovely wife this weekend.  She was asking for ideas about how to get them in the same state.

She stayed behind in their home in North Carolina while he went to his new job in Missouri.  He rented an apartment there.  She was a Marine Wife long enough to know how to handle long seperations beautifully. 

So, she's been there trying to sell their house.  UGH!  With the housing market what it is all over the country she is growing tired of the distance (it's been six months and she still has two middle-schoolers at home).

Here's how you can help.  Help. HELP.

What are some creative ideas for them to SELL THEIR HOUSE.  I know there is someone among you lovely people who know a secret that can help them. 

I will forward your best responses to her.  Thanks for the help.   

Brother Gunny's Grandson

 

While Brother Gunny is ugly as homemade sin his grandson is breathtakingly handsome.  Go figure.

Have you ever seen a more beautiful baby?  Is his face not perfect in it's shape and size?  I mean, really?  Is it just me?  Don't you all see it too?

Future President of the United States.  no pressure sweety -- but Auntie Jenny is planning already.

Brother Gunny loves my Blog....when it's about him.

Dear Brother Gunny,

It seems that the only time you comment on my blog is when the topic is about you.  So,  I'm devoting today's post to a few of the funny things that have happened over the course of our sibling-hood.

The first time you said, "You're adopted" --fortunately I was only 3 weeks old and so it had little effect.  (twitch, twitch, twitch)

"Go ahead, going down the stairs on your head is FUN!"  when I was 2 and you were much, much older (4).

"Hey let's make some mud balls.  Hey let's see who can throw the mud balls the farthest.  Hey, Jenny see if you can hit that car."  Mad laughter as he ran, ran, ran after the car stopped to have a look.  It was a dark day but the start of a promising athletic career.

When at 14  I told you and Mom that I got my first kiss from Drew Keaffaber, you grabbed your head and started screaming, "Oh, no.  we'll never marry her off now, she's been TOUCHED"  Mom thought this was sooooo funny.

When I was in law school and you were on your floats in the middle of the ocean you used to send me money for stuff like Mom's birthday, or Father's day or Christmas so that I could get a present from both of us.  Ha, ha, ha, ha.   First of all, you always sent WAY too much money.  Secondly, I always got the recipient a card (from me) and used the rest of the money to eat for a couple of months.   What did you expect, I was in LAW SCHOOL to become a lawyer....my soul had already been sucked out.

When I got married and you refused to take off Marine Face for the pictures.  EVERY other person in that picture was smiling (including my mother-in-law who admitted it was the darkest day of her life) except Brother Gunny who looked like he was about to storm the narthex.

Oh, the list goes on and on.  Maybe when you comment later you could mention some of your fond memories of me....cheesy smile and eyes batting.

Love,

Your favorite Sister

My (Much Much Much) older brother is 40!

My wonderful older brother turns 40 today.  Happy Birthday big guy.  Who loves ya?  It's me.  the younger one.

Last week my (much older) brother hit another mile stone.  His oldest daughter and her husband had their first child.   Are you kidding me?  We are waaaaaaay too young for this!  Did I mention that he is much, much, much more mature than me?  Not just in years.

He was adult at age 2 (which is when I met him).  He was always a serious person.  While I was busy wondering where I put that dime the parents had just given me, he'd invested his in an interest bearing account at an offshore tax shelter.  I kid you not, the minute he reads this he will be on the phone to me to explain why that last sentence is not possible.  He will explain it using charts and tax tables and numbers.....it's like he doesn't know me at all.

After he met me,  he spent the next 16 years wishing he was in the Marine Corp so that he didn't have to put up with my amatuerish Risk strategies.  Then the next 20 years actually serving in the Marine Corp. The last two he's enjoyed being a retired Gunnery Sargent.  He's an amazing person and one of the world's greatest sources of good advice.  In honor of his birthday I want to offer the following tid-bits to make him smile...

Grandma Aileen always said you were the wonderful one.

Mr. Guenther always said you were the smart one.

Frau Bogess always said you were the nice one.

Def Leppard always said, "for the last 20 years he's been our only fan".

Guess what?  They were all on my payroll.  Grandma was the only one who really gouged me to say it though.  Who loves you big guy?  It's me.  the younger one.