The Courtesy Wave

Stie, at These are a Few of My Favorite Things wrote a post yesterday about road rage.  It struck a chord.

Here's my pet peeve:  no courtesy wave.

I've lived a couple of places.  The drivers in each place have been as different as local accents. 

In Minnesota the people were very nice...until they got behind the wheel of their car, then they became homicidally insane.  I lived there for over three years and was never allowed to merge in traffic.  Not.  Once.  However, the several hundred times I allowed someone to merge in front of me I was greeted with a robust courtesy wave.  I mean we are talking three or four pumps of the hand here.  It fills me with a warm fuzzy feeling just thinking about those waves.

In New Hampshire people allowed you to merge a reasonable amount and as an added bonus also gave a brief wave acknowledging any act of kindness on the road. The wave was one pump at best and just a hand in the air with no pump at the very least.  Typically, every drive whether near (to Manchester) or far (45 minutes to Boston) was met with kind people and earnest wavers.  I mean, even the toll takers were charming there.

Here in Chicagoland driving is a death sport.  People turn on their blinkers more as a warning than anything else...they ARE coming over whether your car is in the way or not.  You'd best let them.  Merging isn't a problem here because people understand the local rules and have an eye toward self-preservation.  However, the courtesy wave is hit or miss.  Some people give a wave while others act as if this is their RIGHT or something.

Listen, I have dealt with a lot of jerky behavior on the road.  I no longer flip people off.  I was never very good at it...but that's another post. 

However, if I let you in and you don't give even the briefest of courtesy waves, I will hunt you down and steal your first-born.  Just so you know.

Comments

[Susan]

I was thinking of this just today when I let someone out of the McDonald's parking lot. Did I get a wave? Heck no! Instead I was left saying "Hey, no trouble at all for letting you out!" in my most irked tone of voice.

[Deborah]

I'm inviting you to party with me!

Win some chocolate from my-sister-in-law and I...we blog about CHOCOLATE...me from Australia...and her from Michigan. Here's the link: http://thechocolistas.blogspot.com/2008/03/ultimate-blog-party-2008.html

What am I doing in Australia? I married an Aussie...and moved to Brisbane, leaving my family and friends and all the right-side-of-the-road drivers in America.

Win a handmade pocket place mat from my blog Comfort Joy Designs. Here's the link:
http://comfortjoydesigns.blogspot.com/2008/03/ultimate-blog-party-2008.html

Want to know more about life in Australia? Visit my A Cup of Joy site where I keep up with my family and friends in America. Here's the link:
http://acupofjoy.wordpress.com/

Happy Partying!

[Amy @ Memoirs of a Mommy]

I'm currently in the Maryland/DC area, and drivers are ruthless here as well. Maybe the larger the area (# of people) the ruder the drivers. At least that's my theory.

[Ann]

I'm a courtesy wave freak, too. If they don't wave to thank me I'm waving at them all sarcastically and saying 'um, You are welcome, douchebag.'
I'm very mature.

[Crazy Daisy]

Love the post :-) I can't imagine driving in Chicago! When I visited I decided on all public transportation as the road ways were to much!

[Danielle]

LMAO....another Aussie !.....

Hrmmmmm...what was I gonna say...Ummmm driving....

Right..I'll be sure to wave from now on although I could do with a break from my first born....> Girl>12> you know what I mean !

[natalie]

i caught you at the party...and boy are you right!! have you ever driven in the dc area??? its brutal!!!

[Chrissy Witt]

Totally agree! At least acknowledge I let you in! At the same point, when the sign says "lane ends in __ miles" get over, don't wait until last minute!! This really frustrates me and start using my mom voice in the car (not like anyone can hear me)!!

[Kat @ The Burb Blog]

Oh wow, I always wave at people who let me in but just because someone let me in doesn't mean I'm going to let the next person in. I don't think it's fair to the person behind me who just let ME in.

Everyone of my friends (indiana) gets freaked out about driving up to Chicago for the weekend, I just pshhhht them. I'm a Southern California girl, I can battle any highway. I learned to drive on a constantly changing 7 lane highway that also happened to be always under construction.

My biggest pet peeve is the same as Chrissy Witt's. Hello! You had a warning AND everyone else got over. NOT FAIR!

[chilihead]

Here in Oklahoma men in trucks are the worst offenders. They cut you off, won't let you in, and if you let them in it's because they are men in trucks and it's their right. I'd love to be older with more insurance. ;)

[Simple Blog Writer SBW]

I'm from MN and I must say you got it right. Minnesotans will spot another car on the entrance ramp and match that car's speed, making merging impossible. I don't know why this happens, and we weren't taught how to do it in driver's ed. Repressed rage, perhaps.

Did you notice the one-finger flick? And no, I don't mean That Finger. Men will raise an index finger in acknowledgement of other drivers. Women don't flick, of course, but will raise all fingers while keeping the palm on the steering wheel. These gestures are considered very frienly and outgoing. A full wave is a bit flashy.

I lived in Chicago for a few years and still have flashbacks about driving down the Ike.

As for my city now, I don't even own a car. Doesn't get better than this.

Great post.

[Christie]

This had me laughing. And it's so funny - we've actually lived parallel lives. I spent three years in Minnesota while hubs went to grad school (know just what you mean about that Minnesota nice-turned-evil behind the wheel) and we lived for six years in Boston (don't get me started about drivers there). No wonder we're friends. We've experienced all the same quirky cities and lived to tell about it.

[Katie]

You know, I am convinced the northern drivers....at least those in Albany, NY where I grew up....are so much more polite to drive with than the southern drivers I share the road with these days. I don't mean this in a mean way at all, I just don't see the courtesy on the road down south. No one uses directionals ("blinkers") and they rarely let you in. I am like you, always letting someone in. I can't count how many times people have seemingly sped up just so I couldn't move over! Back home in Albany, even with traffic, people were courteous. Sigh. Having said that, I much prefer the weather here, and I have found that many people are nice even when they learn where I'm from, so I don't intend to move back north any time soon!

Enjoyed your post very much, it made me laugh and say "Amen to that!" Katie

[Tracye]

Just added you to my favorites!

Always love funny/sarcastic!

I visited my Chicago friend in January, and couldn't open my eyes while she was driving... nearly had a heart attack!

You've got a tough decision... don't know what I'd do. I'm lying. Right now it's 2pm and I'm still in my jammies... heaven, pure heaven!

Happy partying… stop by and say “Hi!” if you get a minute.

www.tracyecakes.blogspot.com

[Caroline]

I can relate! I've lived in the NYC area, Washington DC and now in Miami - 3 areas with reputations of horrible drivers. Miami, BY FAR, is the worst! The drivers here could care less about rules/laws. I would confidently say that more that 75% of the drivers run red lights on a daily basis. Insurance companies know it too. When we moved down here from DC, same cars, same type of commute and everything our insurance nearly tripled! It's crazy!

[Debba]

I lived and MN and totally agree. I always wave. Promise. I do.

So what happened about the job?

I just visited from the Blog Party and got totally sucked into your blog! You're fun and a great writer.

Waves backatcha - Debba / Girlfriendology - a place for inspiration, appreciation & celebration of girlfriends

www.girlfriendology.com
www.girlfriendology.blogspot.com

[nottryingforaboy]

I always wave and I was born and raised in the Chicago city limits and now am in the middle of suburbia. But, we all know I'm an oddity. ;)

That said, I can give a mean finger too.

OT- but I think every blog I go to has been visited by acupofjoy. They're really getting into the party. Oh, to have that amount of time....and desire. LOL

[Wani]

Here is my courtesy wave (bloggin' style)! Happy Blog Party! Come check out my party post! I just love meeting new bloggin' friends!