Yesterday I was looking for something on google. I sometimes do that. Look for stuff. On google, in my purse, often under LuLu's bed. I digress...
Anyway, somehow I got on this. It's the story of a pastor who was having a tough time. It's a great story. It's uplifting. It might have depressed me a little bit, but it did get me thinking.
What is the Hardest Prayer I ever prayed?
I've prayed a lot.
...and sometimes I've only prayed a little.
But I've always prayed.
C.S. Lewis talks eloquently about even his thoughts being a constant prayer to God. I have experienced this at times. A conversation (albeit often one sided) with God about what's going on, my assessment, what I think He probably thinks about it, what I wish He would do for me, and how often, etc.... Yes, just that shallow sometimes. sue me.
But the hardest prayer I ever prayed, I don't know.
My most frequent prayer has been for wisdom.
My most selfish prayers were always for money.
My most selfless prayers have been for people who's names I don't know but that I'd heard about.
My least frequent prayer has been for criticism (I never prayed for that, in fact).
But the hardest?
I think I've prayed the hardest for my princesses. That they would be spared...pain, grief, hardship etc.... And maybe that's been my most selfish prayer. Because by sparing them the tough stuff, they would be denied the gifts the tough stuff brings....compassion, empathy, selflessness.
What have you prayed the hardest for? What are you praying for today?